So close.

The last two weeks have been utter chaos with driving to Harrisburg and Towson numerous times for tests and ultrasounds. My arms are bruised from being pricked so many times and my vajj feels raw! Sorry folks for the TMI, but these blogs aren't intended for those who judge. I am completely blunt and will continue to be. Why? Because this is MY story!

Moving right along.. You're probably wondering why so many ultrasounds when you're not even pregnant?!?! Because I have 40-some follicles, I lost a few (happy dance), and because I recently completed my period, now it's considered a science experiment in my eyes. Once a woman completes her period, ovulation typically starts on its own and releases an egg. Since I was diagnosed with PCOS, ovulation doesn't always happen for me and when it does, it doesn't always do what it's supposed to do... The frequent ultrasounds help measure the follicles that are growing. The egg is attached to the follicle wall. The follicle then ruptures to release the egg. Once released, it's then time to get down and dirty. Yep, SEX!!! Since I am early on in fertility treatments, Bill and I are hoping that "timed intercourse" works for us. The doctors feel it will, since there are no other barriers at this point. I must say, I was frightened Thursday when I went for my ultrasound and the doctor voiced concern about only having one follicle that was measuring 14.2mm. She was unsure if it was a cyst or a follicle. Today confirmed that it is a follicle and it is now measuring 16.5mm. In order to proceed with treatment, the follicle needs to be 18mm. Bill and I went to the Towson office today for more tests and I waited all day, for what it seemed, for the nurse to call with results and the next step. 2pm and the nurse called! I was pacing through the house while the nurse talked to me and I couldn't focus! All I heard was, "You'll need to come back tomorrow for more blood work and another ultrasound." I thought on a Sunday?? What do you mean? I'm supposed to be on vacation!? I paused... The nurse asked if everything was okay. I mentioned that Bill and I have already delayed our vacation two days, but we're fine with having to come down another day and we'll take our vacation another time. The nurse immediately told me she'd call the on-call doctor and figure something out. After two hours of waiting for a call back, the nurse called and apologized for the wait. She said I was cleared and able to head on vacation! However, she taught me the "trigger shot" via the phone! Ohhh my gawd!!!!! Although I work in healthcare, I am not a nurse and neither is my husband. I bet ya'll were wishing you were a fly on the wall then! Ha, this is going to be great! Bill who is somewhat of a worry-wart and scared he may hurt me, and then me, who doesn't necessarily like shots to begin with.. This will go over well! My first shot is Sunday evening between 6pm to midnight. Then it's on like donkey kong until Tuesday morning! (wink, wink) Oh, and I failed to mention what else I'm doing. At Thursday's appointment, the doctor mentioned that I have a thin uterine lining. So to fix this issue, I was prescribed estrates. Estrates are pills that I shove up my vajj to help thicken the lining. Estrates are estrogen hormones. Now mind you, the pill is teal in color. The first day I did this, I went on my merry way to work, had to use the bathroom, pulled down my undies and my undies were TEAL! I freaked!! No one tells you or demonstrates how to insert them... I thought I was doing it wrong, but come to find out, it was fine. Our bodies know what to absorb! I must say, it's amazing how the human body works. 

With how frustrated and upset I have been the past week, I just have to stop and thank each and every one of you. From the messages, texts, phone calls, in person conversations, etc., you all have blown me away from the amount of support you all have for Bill and I. I'll be honest, there's times when I wonder if anyone cares... well, it's absolutely amazing to me the friendships I've created from this experience to the long lasting friendships Bill and I have had from decades ago. Bill and I would not be where we are today without YOU. You all are incredible people! We love you all! Just remember, there are billions of people in this world and although we all suffer from something, we are not alone! This is just my story, what's yours? If you are struggling with something and afraid to open up and talk to someone about it, don't be worried, people can't help you if they don't know! 


You're amazing. You're one of a kind. Love you guys!! 
~Emily